There's been alot on my mind lately. Thoughts of life, the Lord, my place in this world, and the past among many other things. I'm in a period of waiting - a time in my life where I have free time, yet responsibilities - friends, yet needing to continue to meet new faces - a time where I'm currently allowed to live each day as I choose. Lately I have chosen to do little, sleep much, and ponder a great bit. In some regards it has been perfect but in others lonely. Though there is all of this free time in my day the Lord is pushed aside and put on the back burner. Do you ever wonder why, when there's tons of free time, the Lord seems to go to the bottom of the list? It's then that excuses are made - ok, maybe not just then. I'm starting to realize that I am full of excuses for every area of my life. I don't have enough time, I'm not around the right people, I don't FEEL like it (as if feelings should define our lives), I'm too tired, not in the right mood, don't care, etc. The list goes on and on. There's always an excuse or an out - regardless of whether it truly is your fault or not.
Lately, the Lord has been one of the many to get excuses from me. I run out of time, or I'll do it later then later turns into tomorrow and tomorrow turns into this weekend and this weekend turns into Monday and the cycle continues. Having a relationship with the Lord Jesus Christ should not be something that is on our to do list, it should be something that we get excited about doing each day. Having a relationship with Him is like having a relationship/friendship with anyone, it requires time and attention.
Last semester my friend Amanda and I decided that we wanted to make a change in our spiritual lives and start pursuing the Lord regularly so we decided to hold each other accountable to this. We agreed upon reading through the Psalms together and doing at least 30 minutes each morning before we started our day. I can't even begin to tell you how awesome it has been to have someone in my life that I KNOW is going to ask me if I have been in the word lately. It has changed so much of my walk with the Lord. Being back home has brought back old tendencies of putting off the Lord lately but I am committing to pushing through those old tendencies and creating new ones - ones that don't allow for excuses.
Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already arrived at my goal, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. Brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus. -Philippians 3:12-14
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